


InHa Academy

by HanakaLu, HanakasFictions (HanakaLu)



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Crack, EXO - Freeform, EXO are little shit, Everyone listen Minseok, Fic List, Gen, Humor, I don’t know what am I doing, I will add more tag later, List, Luhan is a little shit, M/M, Minseok is badass, Minseok is so done, My first fiction in Engish, No Angst, POV Outsider, Please tell me if you see any mistake, Romance, Rules, Satansoo, Schoolfic, as always, school fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-01
Updated: 2020-03-26
Packaged: 2021-02-19 07:47:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 12,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22507603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HanakaLu/pseuds/HanakaLu, https://archiveofourown.org/users/HanakaLu/pseuds/HanakasFictions
Summary: Like any Academy (or school in general) InHa Academy has its own rules and regulations. However, unlike any other school of this kind, this Academy has very... personalized rules.A global settlement is created because of the problem children we will mention immediately: Huang Zitao, Kris Wu, Luhan, Oh Sehun, Do Kyungsoo, Kim Jongin, Kim Minseok, Kim Jongdae, Park Chanyeol, Byun Baekhyun, Zhang Yixing and Kim Junmyeon.Come and read this regulation, and above all, do not do what they do on a daily basis.(Think about the teachers, supervisors and other students in the school, please).
Relationships: Byun Baekhyun/Park Chanyeol, Do Kyungsoo | D.O/Kim Jongin | Kai, Huang Zi Tao | Z.Tao/Wu Yi Fan | Kris, Kim Jongdae | Chen/Kim Minseok | Xiumin, Kim Junmyeon | Suho/Zhang Yi Xing | Lay, Lu Han/Oh Sehun
Comments: 2
Kudos: 15





	1. Foreword

**Author's Note:**

> It’s my first fiction in English and I don’t really what am I doing. So if you see any mistake please tell me ! (It’s not beta-ed so...)
> 
> Enjoy !

**Rules of procedure of the I Ha Academy.** ** To be followed at all times! **

First of all, I would like to welcome every new student who has arrived this year. I can imagine that the fact that we've given you this booklet instead of a real regulation is somewhat disconcerting. But let me explain why, exactly, this booklet replaces it.

A lot has happened since the Academy opened decades ago now. And I'm aware that its reputation is glorious. Unfortunately, not everything you've heard about this establishment is necessarily true. This is not a regulation like any other. You may find that out as you spend your days here. This is not a regulation like the others. You may find that out as you spend your days here. We've renamed the rules of procedure: « _Warning against Luhan, Do Kyungsoo, Kim Jongin, Oh Sehun, Kim Junmyeon, Kim Minseok, Kim Jongdae, Park Chanyeol, Byun Baekhyun, Huang Zi Tao, Wu Yifan (Kris) et Zhang Yixing_ » (Yes, this title is a bit long, but they are all equally at fault so we had to name them all..)

New students of the Academy, I would advise you to follow these rules to the letter. We were unable to do anything for the top twelve*, but we hope you will take this warning seriously, and that you will not go astray.

Here are some general rules before you start reading this collection:

  1. Everything that's said in this notebook is true! Don't make the mistake of thinking that we made it all up just to scare you..**
  2. Yes, there are handwritten comments all over the book, we decided to reprint them when we realized that they would come back and annotate everything in it.***
  3. You are, this year, the last freshmen to see them in this part of the academy before they leave high school: Please don't try to look like them. It would only hurt your feelings !****
  4. If you have any questions, do not go to the cause of the existence of this notebook, go to your elders of the upper classes and that they have the experience to help you. Send them an email if you can't find anyone. 
    1. In case you can't find anyone, or if no one has the answer to your questions, don't hesitate to send an email to one of your teachers. Or even to me.*****



I hope that you have understood these rules and that in the course of your year with us, you will understand the very existence of this regulation quite ... Personal.

I wish you a happy new year in our academy.

Sincerely,

The headmaster.

* * *

* First of all, thank you very much for that vote of confidence, principal. Now, the one and only reason you couldn't do anything for us is because we did NOT want to listen to you. (It's a big nuance, believe me when I tell you that if we had wanted to, we could all have been exemplary). - **Luhan**.

Don't listen to him, people! The only reason we have to deviate from the right path is because of Luhan! - **Sehun**.

Maybe we're not going to war to find out whose fault this is? I mean, I'm pretty sure we're all to blame... - **Minseok**.

He's got a point! - **Chanyeol**.

** Honestly, people! They wouldn't have the creativity to create even a tenth of what's in there! That's just logic! - **Jongdae**.

Try not to humiliate our dear Professor Jongdae. Because deep down, I like them, personally! - **Baekhyun**.

Same here. They haven't fired us yet, after all. Just when we've started living our lives the way we've been living them since freshman year. And I think that deserves some respect. - **Kyungsoo**.

*** At the same time, you LOVE our comments. This book would be so boring without us! ADMIT IT! - **Jongin**.

**** Yeah, look like us and join us! We have **UNICORNS** \- **Yixing**.

For the last time, Yixing, we don't have unicorns because they don't exist. - **Kris**.

You don't see them just because you refuse to believe in them. - **Yixing**.

No, I don't see them because they're legends. And legends don't exist. Or not anymore. - **Kris**.

I'm telling you they exist! - **Yixing**.

Just because you put a fake horn on a horse's head doesn't make him a Unicorn. - **Junmyeon**.

I thought you loved me! - **Yixing**.

***** OR TO US! WE WILL ANSWER YOU RIGHT AWAY ! - **Tao**.


	2. Chapter 01

**Code of Conduct for : Huang ZiTao, Oh Sehun et Wu Yi Fan (But he want to be called Kris.)**

**HUANG ZITAO:**

**Senior student at the Academy, not the most troublesome element on campus. But being one of the youngest in the group, he’s became one of most spoiled and quick to throw tantrums like a five years child*. He’s not a bad guy (at all.) But he deserve his own Code because he’s not an angel either.**

**Take notes from the following list, you will need it. (Tao received a copy of this list. And it was modified with his own comments because the staff is aware that he would have added them to all the booklet, one at a time anyway.)**

* I have almost seventeen. Thanks you for no longer confusing my age. It would be impressive if I was a senior when I’m only five. And irresponsible of my parents. - **Tao**

I don’t know how you were raised, or how your brain work, Mister Huang, but the administration didn’t mean that literally. - **The Administration.**

* * *

• **BUGS:**

• Butterflies doesn’t exist just to put you through hell, Tao. Stop insulting them, persecuting them and above all, stop screaming as soon as you see one. Live each your own life, and everyone will be happy. (They are neither poisonous, nor are they aggressive. They are adorable and beautiful. Live with it.)* 

• The crawling insects can scare you. They scare a lot of people, that’s true.But they’re not everywhere neither. Try to not scream your dad off every time you think see one, and scare the whole floor. Be the big boy you say you are.

• And for the last time, the conspiracy theory doesn’t exist. Bugs don’t hold meetings every weeks just to decide the next way to give you a heart attack. They’re not at war with you. YOU are at war with them. So please, stop the propaganda with the freshman and junior, with demonstrations against insects and their freedoms.**

* Butterflies are enemies to be wary of all the time ! — **Tao**

No, butterflies live their lives. And you’re paranoid, Tao. — **Sehun**.

** I’m sorry, but first of all, I don’t do « propaganda », I just tell the truth and try toget it across to younger people. I’m doing my role as an elder. Be proud of me. And secondly, the insect conspiracy theory is totally plausible and you know it! — **Tao**.

Sorry, I’ll try to make him see the truth. (But honestly, don’t expect too much.)— **Kris**.

• **THE COMMON AREAS:**

• We would like to make it clear (for the umpteenth time this year alone) that even though the showers are common, this doesn’t mean that you can share it with the person of your choice. There are times and places. A shower for one person and not a shower for two. Please remember this rule once and for all.

•Yes, this rule remains valid even if you are (apparently) afraid of ghosts when you shower alone. (Ghosts don’t exist, Tao.) (And even if they did, why would they want to watch you shower?)*

• No, you can’t force a student to go with you. Much less make him (or her...) look like he (or her...) consented. Go over the first point again.**

• As regards the others common areas, in particular the student’s lounge, it’s forbidden to shout just to frighten the little newcomers who are, I would remind you, only fifteen years old.

• It’s also forbidden to play pool on weekdays.***

•As well as doing karaoke, whether on weekends on weekends or during the week.****

•And last but not the least, you can do « fashion » shows if everyone wants to and without forcing anyone.

• The curtains in the room are not self-service for your creativity. Neither is yours, Tao. This is the fourth time in the last two weeks we’ve had to change them. Next time you will pay them, Tao ! *****

* I don’t know! Because I’m irresistibly handsome? Because they want to memorise everything about me so they know exactly where to find me in a crowded room? There are plenty reasons why someone (A GHOST) would want to watch me shower. — **Tao**.

I don’t even know what to say to him to make him understand that, no, there are no ghosts following him all the time. And that, yes, I’m sure there are no ghosts here at all. Sorry. — **Kris**.

** But— what if the student in question is just as scared? It’s mutual support in that case. Isn’t it? — **Tao**.

No, you can’t share your shower with anyone, Tao. — **Minseok**.

...All right. But, like, can I go with someone who’s waiting for me right outside the door?— **Tao**.

I think it can be done. I’m thinking about it. I’ll make a plan and call you! — **Luhan**.

Why did you bring the crazy one into this, Tao?! — **Sehun**

*** And why is that? If we keep the curfew? — **Tao**

I think it’s because the last time it happened, we poked a hole in the ground... — **Baekhyun**.

Oh, yeah. That’s right. — **Tao**

**** Our freedom of expression is in danger. — **Tao**

***** ...Take some ugly ones, he won’t touch them. (And yes, I mean that in the sense, take some nice ones for the common people, it will be ugly for him.) — **Chanyeol**.

• **THE WORLD DOESN’T BELONG TO YOU:**

• You don’t own Gucci, Tao. Live with this fact and you’ll see, all becomes more beautiful.

• Kris is not your wallet. Give him his money back and get a job at the Academy to earn your own money.

•The teachers’ lounge is NOT a warehouse where you can store your old Gucci’s you don’t want anymore. Throw them away or sell them to get money for the new ones. (Do you want to do marketing later, or not ?) *

•You like Gucci. Everybody gets that. Stop trying to get everyone in this establishment to like them, too. (And yes, I also mean the staff.)**

•Homework is not optional. If they are given by a teacher during one of his or her classes, they must be done and presented in the next class. Huang ZiTao is not exempt from this fact. (The classes themselves are not optional either, Tao. You must attend every day and be diligent in your attendance. That's what a school is.) ***

* Actually, I don't. I don't want to do any marketing at all. I don't know where you got that idea. - **Tao**.

You told them at the end of last year, Tao. - **Kris**.

I thought you were on MY side! - **Tao**.

I'm not so sure about that anymore... - **Kris**.

** But Gucci's are beautiful, and if people don't like them, it's blasphemy and sacrilege. And I'm the man for the job, I have to set them straight! - **Tao**.

You went off course so long ago... Get yourself straightened out, and then we can talk about it again. - **Sehun**.

*** Even if I don't want to? - **Tao**

Even if you don't feel like it, and you want to sleep, and even if the world is coming to an end. You take your courage like a man (who is not afraid of ghosts and insects because, and I quote, "I do wushu. So I can face them AND win! ) and you're going to class!- **Kyungsoo**.

That’s mean! - **Tao**.

• **Last minute rules:**

• Kris isn’t a stuffed animal. If he doesn’t want a hug, that means no hug. (Especially for Tao.) Even tough Huang ZiTao thinks he’s half koala.*

• In fact, stop thinking that all living, healthy people want to be hugged. It’ll save a lot of time.

•Don’t encourage innocent students to do the stupid things you want to do (but are too scared to do them.) and then act innocent later. (Yes, Tao. No one is so foolish that they think the idea comes from a freshman who’s still too shy to tell a teacher that he (or she) made a mistake.)**

•And above all, wushu is not the solution when you’re not happy! Wushu is a traditional Chinese martial art. You’re strong in this discipline, everyone knows it. Now, don’t use it anymore to get what you want when your hugs don’t work. (The nurse lets you know that if she gets a new patient because of wushu, it will be herself in person who will punish you.)

* I AM half koala. It’s in my DNA, I can’t lie about it. — **Tao**

No. At worst you’re half panda, and that’s clearly not the same thing. — **Jongin**.

**... Sometimes I’m actually innocent. — **Tao**

It’s just from pretending that no one believes you when you really are, Love. — **Kris**

Oh... I never thought of it like that. — **Tao**

* * *

**OH SEHUN:**

**Oh Sehun is the youngest of the whole group. (Who, I remind you, are twelve!) He’s not insufferable in itself. But he’s... Special. (Even if Zhang Yixing wins the golden palm for being the most special of the group. However we will come back to him later.)**

**Oh Sehun alone is manageable, calm and often by himself, not bothering his world. Unfortunately for everyone, he’s rarely alone. Often with Tao and Jongin, and more so with Luhan. (And the third one is a special case.* But as for Yixing, we’ll come back to him later.)**

**However, don’t be fooled by his air of seriousness. Like the eleven other people who are the cause of this booklet, Oh Sehun is anindividual who must be avoided at all costs.** Despite his status as the most handsome in the school. (But all twelve of them are, which makes the task of staying away from them almost impossible...***)**

* Luhan is Luhan. And honestly, he’s not a case. — **SEHUN**

Ooooh! Thank you Sehunnie!— **LUHAN**

No, What I mean is that even cases are better than him as a whole. It’s the rule. - **SEHUN**

I don’t know you anymore! Get out my life, Satan! — **LUHAN**

Someone called me? — **KYUNGSOO**

... SOO! — **LUHAN**

** Well, thank you. I mean, it doesn’t hurt me at all, because I am not a humain being with feelings and all that. Not at all! — **SEHUN**

I’m glad you finally understood, Love! — **LUHAN**

I’ll slit your throat in your sleep,but at least you’ll know why, Luhan! — **SEHUN**

***... Thank you ? — **SEHUN**

• **You’re far too young to be so jaded:**

• I remind you that all violence is forbidden to in this establishment. Even if it’s self-inflicted. I repeat for the special case: Oh Sehun must not hit his head on any flat surface available inside (and outside) this establishment. Respect your neurons and your brain, you’re young, I’m sure you still need it!*

•The younger years are all new, and still happy to live and marvel at the little things. Oh Sehun must let them do as they please. Stop always trying to scare them and make them as unhappy as a man in his 40s who has failed everything in life. (Yes, even though it’s hilarious.)**

•Robots can have feelings if their inventor decides to give them feelings. However, Oh Sehun is not a robot and must stop acting like one.***

• This includes: The demand for oil to wake up better in the morning, the demand for charging to sleep better at night and the excuse for not having to answer what someone talks to you.

•Let me stress this point: OH SEHUN IS NOT A ROBOT. NO MATTER WHAT LUHAN MAY SAY!

* I’m not so sure about that. I have a feeling I’m not going to miss the neurons, on the contrary... If it means I won’t understand what’s going on around me anymore... — **Sehun**

Why are you always so cold to the mortals Sehunnie ? — **Luhan**

It’s all your fault! — **Sehun**

Huh? Why?— **Luhan**

Because it’s always your fault!— **Sehun**

Kids, calm down! — **Junmyeon**

** If we can’t have fun now... I thought we lived in a free country... — **Sehun**

Keyword? THOUGHT. — **Kyungsoo**

*** Technically, I know I’m a humain being. (As I said before... ) but I think that hearing it makes me believe it...— **Sehun**

I think it could possibly, maybe, hopefully be my fault... Oops ? — **Luhan**

You’re lucky you’re pretty or I’d have shoved your pretty face in a wall. — **Sehun**

I love you too, love of my life. — **Luhan**

• **The relationship full of contradictions of Sehun and Luhan:**

•You have to make choices in life. The same goes for you, Sehun. Luhan is either your mortal enemy and in this case, you avoid him. (Because killing someone is illegal, I remind you, just in case...) or the love of your life, and in this case.... Do Whatever you want to do, but out of sight of the most sensitive. *

• Don’t intentionally piss off Luhan. I repeat, Sehun, don’t intentionally (or accidentally) annoy Luhan. He’s already not really calm under normal circumstances, so everyone is terrified when he’s angry (or annoyed). And everyone who knows you a little bit, knows that you have a little too much fun when you piss him off.

• In the worst case scenario, piss him off in private, and take responsibility for your actions. Everyone will be happy, and your trauma may be the trigger for you to stop once and for all! **

• Class hours AND classrooms aren’t there for you to complain to whoever wants to heart it. Mostly from Luhan. They’re there for you to learn things. Have the respect to listen to the teachers who are starting to have bald spots and stomach problems because of you twelve.

•Yes, that includes complaining about Luhan. Taking your classmates for psychologists. Complaining to your teachers about Luhan. Dreaming about Luhan. And liking to complain about Luhan because you love him so much that you want to stick him in the wall every ten minutes or so.***

• Luhan is his own man. If he wants to talk to other people, you have to let him. I don't want to hear any more complaints from the nurse about you threatening other students (mostly males) for talking to Luhan. (Complaint that applies to the men in question who are traumatized because you're scary, I understand that. But also for yourself who ends up there every time Luhan is done with you).

• Yes, they're not part of your group of friends. Yes Luhan is loved by many people (often wrongly****) but no, it’s not forbidden. Rule over your jealousy. I remind you that threatening people can be punished by law!

* We're already doing that! It's not our fault nobody knows how to knock on the door before we open it.— **Sehun**

Or if no one knows how to be discreet. Or it's not our fault if we always get caught!— **Luhan**

Yes, you are. Because they don't knock on the door because it is NOT the door of one of your rooms, but often the door of a classroom. — **Kyungsoo**

And they surprise you all the time because you're in a hallway. Of course, from the old building, but it's just as public!— **Junmyeon**

** Yeah, but no. Pissing him off in private is a lot less fun. And more importantly, I don't want to be punished for it! — **Sehun**

Oh, I have an idea! Why don't you piss me off at all? — **Luhan**

No. I can't do that. It's my duty as your boyfriend to piss you off. Just not at me. — **Sehun**

You’ve corrupted him, Luhan! — **Baekhyun**

*** Ooooh, so you're complaining about me? First news... - **Luhan**

You complain about him every hour of every minute of every second. Looks like a match made in heaven, doesn't it? - **Minseok**

I thought you were my best friend, Minseok? - **Luhan**

Minseok is the voice of wisdom. - **Jongdae**

You shut up. - **Luhan**

Complaining about you is written on my CV, in big, bold, underlined letters.Sometimes even highlighted... - **Sehun**

All traitors! - **Luhan**

**** Okay, no. Luhan doesn't talk to other men who are just here to get him into bed. There's a limit to everything! - **Sehun**

He's so cute. And he's my boyfriend, lucky me! - **Luhan**

But most of all, I don't want them to be traumatized once they actually learn who Luhan is... It's too late for me, but not for them - **Sehun**

Yeah, I can understand that reasoning. - **Kyungsoo**

• **Last minute rules:**

• The roofs of the old building are partially destroyed and are absolutely not secured, so it’s strictly forbidden to go there. This rule applies mainly to Oh Sehun. Under no circumstances should you go dancing there. It’s dangerous. So forbidden.

• Kim Minseok is not an authority figure at this academy. He's a student Oh Sehun (and the other 11) must listen to the teachers BEFORE Kim Minseok *

• Oh Sehun is not Tarzan. So he is asked to move normally and like everyone else. That is, on floor. I don't know where he gets the idea that it's perfectly normal to move differently. (Nor how he moves around on walls, chairs or statues). (And one strange time, on the ceilings of the corridors. Just, how? **)

* Kim Minseok is honestly scarier than any of the adults around us - **Luhan**

Minseok also has a bigger aura that commands respect - **Baekhyun**

Minseok is also the only person we want to listen to - **Jongin**

... All I'm saying is that Minseok is serious, so it makes us want to follow him! - **Kyungsoo**

He's a good leader - **Kris**.

He's MY lover. - **Jongdae**

I don't want Minseok to look at me with that look that says "I'm so disappointed in you right now! " - **Sehun**

Same here. - **Chanyeol, Tao, Junmyeon, Yixing.**

I want to go far far away - **Minseok**

** A magician never reveals his secrets- **Sehun**

Velcro. He was wearing Velcro. - **Luhan**

What don't you understand about "It's a secret, Luhan. You don't tell anyone. » ? - **Sehun**

I don't understand your language... - **Luhan**

Oh, my God! - **Minseok**

* * *

**WU YIFAN (KRIS) :**

**Kris has the physique to be a Leader. Someone serious. Someone respectable, and we all believed him at first. But don’t be fooled! First of all, he’s in a relationship with Huang ZiTao (His list is above.) Secondly he’s probably the first person I would advise you not to follow.**

**I don’t have much else to tell you about him, so we’ll start his own code of conduct, which is not as bad as the first two.**

**PS: The administration would like to remind you that just because we don’t have much to say about Kris doesn’t mean he’s harmless and does nothing. On the contrary, he’s still one of the twelve people to avoid.**

• **Say what you’re thinking and feeling:**

• It's absolutely not illegal to like chicken, Yifan*. So even if you think chicken "isn't your style", even if you like it, EAT IT. You're only seventeen years old, act like a seventeen-year-old and eat what you like if you can. (I also want to remind you that chicken or any other food has no "style" so for anyone who wants to look like Yifan** EAT CHICKEN IF YOU LIKE IT. This is his case).

• Tao is not your master. If you want to say "no" to him, say "no" to him. Stop always saying "yes" . Or it’ll only hurt him.

• You can't buy people's affection. Don't buy all the Gucci in the world just because Tao wants them. (No matter how much they love them. He always ends up putting them in the teachers' lounge. It's not allowed***)

•If Tao doesn't want something to eat, you don't have to eat for him. He's a big boy and there are plenty of other choices on the menu.

* Kris. My name is Kris, and I won't answer to any other name but that one! - **Kris**

I confirm. - **The administration**

** I just told you I only answer to Kris. - **Kris**

They call you by the first name on your chart, Kris. - **Tao**

Even so. Let them change it! - **Kris**

... We can't do that, Mr. Wu YiFan- - **the Administration**.

*** Injustice. It's nothing but injustice. - **Tao**

• **ARTISTIC DOESN'T RHYME WITH TEENAGE CRISIS:**

• Everyone has the right to like what they like. To think they have talent (because for some, they do.) or even to do what they like, when they have free time and in a place that is either: public or privatized. Wu YiFan (sorry, Kris) is by no means Picasso. Is not an artist. The art teacher is about to resign if he goes back to his classroom again to find every wall covered with your drawings Kris. And that would be the sixth since your freshman year. *

•To continue on this topic: classrooms are not your playgrounds. Or your workshop, Kris. We provided you with a room when you came to the Academy boarding school (compulsory, of course) to use for drawing or whatever you want to do with pencils and a blank piece of paper. Go to class to learn.

•Tao is by no means objective when he judges your paintings. He is in a relationship with you (even if we ask ourselves "WHY" every day of the week) and therefore wants to please you. And make you buy him Gucci, too. **

• Yes, this includes any form of drawn art: Painting, watercolour, pencil, pens.

•No, you're not allowed to draw on the walls. ***

* It's not my fault that you just hire people with no talent and who don't understand me. - **Kris**

It's not that they don't understand you Krissou, it's just that at some point in your life you're going to have to get used to the idea that you're not good at drawing. - **Luhan**

But I'm sure you have other talents... For example, you are the only one who can calm Tao down...? - **Junmyeon**

Just, uh... Stop trying to make us see your "talents" all the time. Be more private, keep them to yourself. - **Minseok**

... If even Minseok says so... - **Kris**

** Thanks for turning me in. I'll remember that. - **Tao**

... It wasn't so much a secret, Love. - **Kris**

*** How did they know I wanted to do that? - **Kris**

You're just not discreet. - **Sehun**

Oh. - **Kris**.

• **Last minute rules:**

• Cats aren't monsters who only want to eat you, Kris. Stop running away from them like that when they've done absolutely nothing to you. (They don't follow you, don't stare at you and don't want to kill you.) If you don't love them, ignore them, they do it as well. *

• You and Tao are officially banned from the communal showers at the same time. If Tao's showering, Kris must be in his room. That's the rule. If you choose to disregard it, you'll both be punished accordingly. Don't take us lightly. We will punish you! **

•Yes, Kris. If you do something wrong, or if you don't follow the rules, you'll be punished accordingly. That's why they're called rules. You have to follow them like everyone else. Even if it's not your "style".

•That goes for Tao as well.

•For the last time: KIM MINSEOK IS NOT THE ONE WHO LEADS HERE. If you want to listen to him and make him your leader, so be it. But don't forget he's just a student like all of you, and therefore has no authority over the teachers or the administration.

• Also, Kim Junmyeon is not your legal guardian. He can't help you if you've committed acts that must be punished. You're here to learn how to become independent, not to find surrogate parents. Take responsibility for yourself!

* Okay, I know I may be a little bit influenced by Tao and his fear of bugs. But I still maintain that cats are after my person, and you're not going to change my mind! - **Kris**

You're influencing yourself, Kris. Don't involve me into that. I like cats. (Although I prefer dogs.) - **Tao**.

You two are influencing each other, so just assume responsibility and shut up. - **Minseok**

Yes Minseok.. - **Tao & Kris**

** But why?! We're not doing anything wrong! - **Tao**

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Maybe with this rule I could ALWAYS shower quietly. (I love you, Tao.) - **Kris**

Kris, you and I are gonna have words. Who will form sentences. Who'll turn into a fight. - **Tao**

You screwed up... - **Jongdae**

*** For the last time: It's not our fault that Minseok has more authority than you - **Kris**

Please stop. I just want to be quiet this year... - **Minseok**

Love. You know as well as I do that's not possible. - **Jongdae**

I hate to say it, but your boyfriend is right. - **Kyungsoo**


	3. Chapter 02

**Code of conduct for : Do Kyungsoo, Kim Minseok et Kim Junmyeon. (The most mature of groupe...)**

**DO KYUNGSOO:**

**Isn’t the oldest. But the most mature and the most likely to want to act normally and seriously. However, we wish to stress the fact that he still has a certain inclination towards violence.* Except for Kim Jongin (we’ll talk about him later.) We’ve heard from several people in the group that he’s, in fact, trying to stop hit everyone. And everything.**

**But we’re still waiting to see progress. (We sincerely hope it will succeed.)**

**He therefore deserves, like the eleven other, his own code of conduct. Which he has, of course, read and approved. (We are not above his certain... tendencies. Hint: Scary look in his eyes.)**

* I wouldn’t say I’m inclined towards violence. But the behaviour of those I call my friends makes me murderous. - **Kyungsoo**

Personally, I think if you hit everyone for their slightest move, Jongin should get the same treatment. - **Baekhyun**

It’s not my fault that your Chanyeol deserves this more than the others. I suspect he’s doing his shit on purpose to get hit... - **Kyungsoo**

I wish I could tell you otherwise, but even I know you’re right. - **Baekhyun**

• **The violence:**

• We would like to remind you that violence is by no means the answer to all the problems you may encounter in your lives. We would also appreciate if Do Kyungsoo would take note of this fact, and stop trying to kill/torture/do disappear Park Chanyeol. It’s not legal. We’re sure there are other options.*

• From that perspective, Park Chanyeol is NOT a punching bag. He has bones and muscles. As well as organs that can be damaged. The nurse also gave us a warning if she had to keep seeing him every day of the week. Even Saturdays. (And occasionally Sundays.)

• Likewise, Do Kyungsoo is asked to put on his glasses at any time of the day, not just when he wants to. First years are not used to being scowled at and are not aware of the fact that you can’t see anything without your glasses.**

• Knives in the cafeteria and kitchen rooms cannot be moved. They will remain where they are.

• Finally: We have a gym at our disposal which can be booked with one of the supervisors and/or coaches of the academy. If you ever feel like hitting something, use this room.***

* No. I see absolutely no other options. Chanyeol brings out my hunting instincts. I can’t help it. - **Kyungsoo**

He’s my best friend, people! - **Chanyeol**

Does he know about this ? - **Luhan**

I don’t dare tell him... - **Chanyeol**

That means you should change best friend. - **Kris**

... Maybe. - **Chanyeol**

** It’s not that I don’t want to wear them. It’s that I keep forgetting them. And I want to remind you that I can see very well in class as long as I’m in front of the class and everything’s close enough. - **Kyungsoo**

We don’t want to hear about it. Do you have glasses? You put glasses on. - **Administration**

*** It’s not the same. And it’s less fun. If I promise to use it, can I take Chanyeol with me? - **Kyungsoo**

No. - **Baekhyun**

... I’ll take you then. - **Kyungsoo**

You’re so lucky, Love! - **Chanyeol**

• **There are things you can’t do:**

• Luhan isn’t the cause of every mess that happens in this establishment. Stop assuming that it’s always his fault. (Even if it’s the same for us, too. At least try to be subtle and get all the facts before you accuse him.)*

• In case where Luhan is the culprit, and even if it’s not up to you to punish him, if you still decide to do so, punish LUHAN for the fault that LUHAN has committed. Not Chanyeol. Who aren’t at fault.**

• The kitchens made provided for students can be used by those who have not taken culinary options. Please use them. The common areas, hallways and your room are NOT meant for someone to cook in.

• Penguins are not allowed in this establishment. It’s forbidden to bring, breed or keep them as pets. Do Kyungsoo must not bring any more penguins into the Academy’s grounds under the risk of expulsion. There are laws. Respect them.***

* I punish who I want to punish and blame who I want to blame. I am, in theory, aware that Luhan doesn’t do all the shit around here. But it’s just so much easier to pin it all on him. Especially when you know that even if he’s not the main cause, he’s still more or less in it. - **Kyungsoo**

I want to be offended and hurt by what you just wrote that the whole academy can read.But it’s the no est truth, and I’m being honest like this. So I’m going act like a big boy and take responsibility. (But I’m going after Sehun. Just to say!) - **Luhan**

Why do you always drag me into things like this. - **Sehun**

Because you signed a contract when you agreed to go out with me. Deal with it! - **Luhan**

** Yeah. No.— **Kyungsoo**

*** But penguins are adorable! - **Kyungsoo**

... ... That doesn't mean you can bring them in here at all! And Jongin stops helping him! - **Minseok**

But Minseok... - **Jongin**

No. - **Minseok**

Even if we’re careful? - **Kyungsoo**

No. - **Minseok**

... That’s mean. But okey, since you asked... - **Kyungsoo**

• **Last minute rules:**

• Jongin is no angel. Please accept that fact!*

• Kim Jongin does at least as much mischief as Oh Sehun, Byun Baekhyun and Kim Jongdae. He’s just much more subtle.

• Satan does not exist (or no longer exists, depending on the position) thank you for stopping making everyone believe that you are his reincarnation. **

• Also, stop trying to make him come up with idiotic rituals. Not only does it not work, it makes a mess all over the academy. ***

• Minseok doesn't have the answer to all the questions in the universe. And even though we feel we're going to need to tell everyone, please stop taking him for the authority figure. He's not. He can't punish you, he can't expel you, and he can't even reward you if you do something good! ****

• Yes. We know that Kim Jongin is a good dancer. No. That doesn't mean he can dance anywhere in the establishment. Stop encouraging him!

* Jongin is an angel and anyone who says otherwise is just a brainless idiot. - **Kyungsoo**

No. Yixing is an angel. Jongin is just smarter at hiding the fact that he's as evil as the rest of the group. - **Junmyeon**

Excuse me? Yixing is anything but a saint! - **Kyungsoo**

I'm with Kyungsoo on this. Except Jongin is doing it on purpose and Yixing isn't! - **Luhan**

... He's not so wrong. For once... - **Kyungsoo**

** How do you know I'm not his reincarnation? I mean, unless one of the people working in the administration is, in fact, his reincarnation, you have no way of knowing. So let me do my research in peace. - **Kyungsoo**

I already told you, Kyungsoo. If you want to keep going, keep going. I'll stop paying for repairs and cleaning. - **Junmyeon**

Oh, please! Everybody knows it's just talk! - **Minseok**

Let me believe for ten seconds that I'm a firm person that everyone takes seriously. - **Junmyeon**

*** Yes, but no. I want to meet him. I have so many questions to ask him, and so much to learn from him! - **Kyungsoo**

You scare me a little bit sometimes... - **Jongdae**

Go hide behind Minseok and leave me alone - **Kyungsoo**

**** Technically, he can. It just won't go on our record. - **Kyungsoo**

I agree. And honestly we're more proud when it comes from Minseok than when it comes from you... - **Jongin**

I think I speak for everyone when I say that no matter how many times you tell us this, it won't change the fact that we respect and listen to Minseok more than you... - **Luhan**

* * *

**KIM MINSEOK:**

**Is apparently the new headmaster of this academy.* More seriously, Kim Minseok is a respectable person, and honestly the only person in the group you can go to if you need to. (But really if it’s an emergency....) He’s the authority figure of the group even if he’s not officially their leader. He is, unfortunately, in relationship with Kim Jongdae. (Not the worst of them, but in the top 04.)**

**He’s the only person with the power to stop the other eleven in under three seconds, and for that, he has our respect. (And our gratitude.)**

**However, as with the rest of them, beware. He is a little bit... Crazy?** So he needs his own code, because it’s our duty to warn you about what he’s expecting you to do.** (Do not trust anyone in this group. Even the most harmless looking ones!)**

**PS: He’s also the oldest. Don’t let his baby face fool you!**

* No. No. No. I didn’t sign up for this. Why are you doing this to me? What did I do to you?! - **Minseok**

...Nothing? But that’s how we set it. - **Administration**

Yeah, well, stop it! - **Minseok**

** I’m hurt and offended by it. I’m not going to stop Luhan, Baekhyun and Jongdae’s bullshit for at least two weeks. That’s not my problem anymore! - **Minseok**

I’m honestly afraid for the Administration... - **Kyungsoo**

• **Being the authority figure and eldest emblem of a group can be difficult:**

• Jongdae has to behave himself. The Academy is not his playground. You're the closest. Keep him calm. *

• Stop running away from your responsibilities. Because, yes, you do have them.

• Such as the fact that since you are the only person they listen to, use this advantage to make them more serious!

• Also try to get Sehun, Jongin and Yixing to STOP dancing on the roofs of the abandoned building, it’s very dangerous and little incentive for other students to try.

• Don't stick your head in the sand. Luhan is a dangerous individual, keep him on a leash. **

• You're the oldest in the group. Act like one and take your responsibilities seriously, Minseok. You owe it to yourself to set an example (Alright, you do that normally. But do it more, maybe on a misunderstanding it'll work out)

• If you don't want to be responsible for the twelve children in your care, make sure they stop thinking of you as the authority figure to follow. And make them understand that teachers, supervisors and administrators are the ones they should listen to. Thank you. ***

* First of all: I'm not his mother. He can still do what he wants. I can TRIAL to keep him calm. He doesn't have to listen to me under any circumstances. Second: Have you ever met Kim Jongdae? And lastly: Have you ever seen Kim Jongdae, Byun Baekhyun, Luhan and Park Chanyeol together or...? - **Minseok**

... He's not entirely wrong. - **Jongdae**

** Asking Sehun about it,he's the one handling it. - **Minseok**

Why so much hatred? - **Sehun**

He's your responsibility. You signed a contract, we were all there! - **Kyungsoo**

I repeat: why so much hatred? - **Sehun**

*** No. No and no. I said it and I'll say it again, I didn't sign up for this. If you can't stand up for yourself, then I can't do anything for you. I'm tired and I want to hibernate. Leave me alone! - **Minseok**

• **Absolute rules:**

• Just like we told Kyungsoo, squirrels are not allowed here. No more trying to keep them in secret, Minseok.

• Jongdae's whims should no longer be accepted No matter how much you love him. Even more so if it's just because he's annoying and you want him to leave you in peace *

• Even more so if it's so that you can have peace. Because it works at first, but in the long run, it gets worse. Learn from your mistakes, Minseok

• Rooftops are not a playground. And are not accessible. They’re not hiding places, much less a place where you can take a naps. Stop going up there. Honestly, even if you don’t go on top of the old building, it doesn’t mean you’re still allowed to go on the rooftops of the main building!**

• By the way, now that you can’t go on the roofs of the main building, it doesn’t mean you can go on the roofs of the old building. Again.***

* ...Mainly because he’s becoming a pain in the ass pretty quickly. - **Minseok**

God, I feel so much love in you, babe! - **Jongdae**

That’s good... - **Minseok**

** And if I want to rest for ten minutes, where can I go? They find me everywhere, and I’m the only one with the key to the roof! - **Minseok**

...Wait. Your got the keys?! - **Luhan**

Go bother Sehun, Luhan. Adults talk here! - **Minseok**

Shit, Minseok. Damn it! - **Sehun**

I mean, why did you give me the keys if I can’t go? - **Minseok**

*** Damn it!— **Minseok**

• **Last minute rules:**

• Shut your eyes and pray that when you reopen them all will be gone, or it’ll be gone or even over, or that’s you’ll be somewhere else doesn’t work. Believe us, we’ve tried it before. Lots of times.*

• Stop calling Kyungsoo every time something doesn’t go your way, you you get too lazy to do something.

• Too many people have been sent to the infirmary. Either because of injuries (which, we hope with all our heart, were not caused by Kyungsoo, but mor by the fear that the people concerned did not look where they were fleeing to and hurt themselves in their haste.)

• The ruse is about to have a nervous breakdown. LET. HER REST WHEN SHE CAN!**

• Jongdae’s jokes are not imagined and made alone.

• Either you stand up for ALL those involved. Or you’re not defending anyone. Jongdae isn’t the only person on this planet. You’re taking too much after Kyungsoo and it’s getting scary.***

* It’s not gonna stop me from trying, you know? - **Minseok**

I know the feeling. I know the feeling so well. - **Kyungsoo**

I do the same thing every time I see Luhan. And since we’re kind of in a relationship together, that’s a lot of time. (Hasn’t managed to make him go away yet...) - **Sehun**

Oh Sehun, I love you with all my heart and I really hope we will end our lives together. But if you continue and I have to kill you, it might jeopardise that dream. So please shut up! - **Luhan**

** Like it’s our fault! If people would just leave us alone. - **Kyungsoo**

*** Kyungsoo is a good role model. At least no one has to piss him off all day long. - **Minseok**

Oh, that’s the nicest compliment you’ve given to me, Minseok. I’m touched. - **Kyungsoo**

You guys are honestly weird. I love you guys so much. - **Baekhyun**

* * *

**KIM JUNMYEON:**

**The wisest. And the richest, too. (Technically, everyone in this academy is more or less rich. Except those with the scholarships, but generally speaking, those with with the scholarships are the most respected.) (Maybe that’s why Junmyeon is one of the least respected, now that we think about it...)* He must be the only person in the group who really wants to follow the rules.**

**Unfortunately, he may not be able to. Being friends with ten people who categorically refuse to follow anything that does not benefit them can be quite complicated.* Then there is the fact that he is in a relationship with the one and only Zhang Yixing, who has a rule book that make just for him. And finally, the fact that Junmyeon, despite his great willingness to follow the rules, simply cannot live and function like ordinary people.**

**So he, too, needed his own code of conduct. (Even though we know for a fact that he will not follow it. We understood it and more or less accepted it.)****

* Thank you for understanding my pain. - **Junmyeon**

Stop complaining, we’re not that difficult. We’re just a little... Eccentric, that’s all! - **Luhan**

Excuse me? Do you need me to make a list of everything you’ve done in the last two years again? - **Administration**

No. But thank you. I take it back. Goodbye and have a nice day. - **Luhan**

** Why are you accepting it for him and not for us? - **Minseok**

Because he has extenuating circumstances. You can’t deny that. Plus, his father is one of the biggest donors to the academy. - **Administration**

Yeah, it’s mostly the last part that matters, huh? - **Baekhyun**

• **Zhang Yixing is a human being like any other.**

• No matter what people say, and what YOU say, Yixing is not an angel made of pure white. He is, indeed, a little bit in the Moon, and many things he says and does are out of his control. However, if no one ever takes him seriously, it can get out of hand very quickly. He IS a VERY clever person. *

• There's no such thing as unicorns. And everyone knows you don't believe that. So stop trying to make everyone pretend they exist just to please Yixing. You're doing him more harm than good by not trying to make him see the truth.

• Also, unicorns should NOT be created from a horse. First of all, because we're pretty sure that it can look like animal abuse. But also because it doesn't hurt Yixing, as mentioned above, he needs to understand the reality of things.

• Of course, the horse can also lose self-confidence and fall into depression. He is an extremely intelligent animal. And if he thinks that nobody can love him as he is, this can have disastrous consequences. (Both the horse and the human) **

• You also have to stop accepting and saying "Amen" to all the experiments Yixing wants to do. Three explosions in four days, Junmyeon. It can't go on like this anymore. Even Luhan doesn't blow up the academy property like that. ***

* I'm aware of Yixing's intelligence, thank you very much. But that doesn't mean anything. The fact that he's smart doesn't mean he can't be protected with all it take. In cotton wool, in a glass case that's safe in a safe deposit box. - **Junmyeon**

I’m not sure how I’m gonna be able to tell you this. (We all drew straws and I lost.) But that’s called sequestration, Jun’! You mustn’t do that! - **Jongin**

Even Luhan never got this far with Sehun. - **Tao**

...Not that he’s not tried. - **Sehun**

It was ONCE! - **Luhan**

** But... How can I do then? - **Junmyeon**

You're not doing anything, Jun. You need to stop overprotecting him. Yi' is a big boy, and you scare the first years when you do that. - **Kris**

... I'll have to find something else, then. Because I don't want the horse to feel bad... - **Junmyeon**

We lost him, I think. - **Jongdae**

*** Excuse me, but I haven’t blown anything up since the end of my freshman year. So I don’t think I’m a good example. - **Luhan**

Luhan, babe, you’re ALWAYS a very good example for things like this. - **Sehun**.

• **Your money isn’t a weapon, much less a shield:**

• You need to learn to say « no ». It’s not technically your money, it’s your parents’ money. And even if it was yours, you can’t always say yes. Even if it makes you happy.

• Money isn't everything. Stop giving "bribes" to everyone. They're still children. They can't give you anything. And you don't want anything from them.

• Yes, even if it's to plan your future. You can have collaborators, allies or whatever when you're old enough to take over the family business? (Or to start a new one.) At the moment, you're a minor, still in school. So stop that right now.

• Besides, it's most likely to be totally illegal to do that. *

• You can't give money like that so they'll lie to the teachers so the rest of the group won't haveproblems. That's not how they'll grow up, Junmyeon.

* But how do I do it then? - **Junmyeon**

Like everybody else. You take your courage in both hands and try to get everyone to like you for you and not for your money. - **Luhan**

... You don't do it like that. - **Jongin**

I'm special. - **Luhan**

• **Last minute rules:**

• You're not a human shield. You're all grown-up boys about to become adults, and in a very short time will be entering the world of work. Act like a human being, and as an almost adult, and stop sheltering everyone. You don't have the authority to do anything anyway. *

• We never thought we'd say this, but yes, classes are important Junmyeon. However, that's not all. Learn to relax the pressure, and do things that almost eighteen-year-olds do. Learn a little from your friends (except Luhan, Byun Baekhyun and Kim Jongdae**) and have fun, rest and take your head out of your textbooks, they'll still be where you left them when you come back!

• Likewise, it is not reasonable for you to run away from all reality by immersing yourself body and soul in your classes. You're lucky that you haven't fainted yet, but it won't be long now if we are to believe the nurse's words. You need to learn to face the reality that is right in front of you.

• Yes, even if it’s ugly.

• The same if Luhan tries to teach Yixing to make a fire without a lighter. Especially in this case. (Especially if Luhan talks to Yixing at all.)

• We would like to remind you (although we didn't think we had to do it for an Academy...) that nails are forbidden inside the building, unless you are part of the maintenance.

• So are baseball bats. Unless you're in gym class and it's on your teacher's orders.

• On the same lineage, nails driven into baseball bats are also prohibited. (Even more.) Kim Junmyeon is therefore asked to stop making these baseball bats himself, which are more weapons than sports (or DIY) tools ***

• The Academy's dorms are checked every Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday, as well as on certain days on a random and unannounced basis. Kim Junmyeon is requested not to have any cats in his room. This is your last warning. ****

* But how can I help my friends if I don't act like this? - **Junmyeon**

Junmyeon, there are so many other ways to protect them other than acting as a shield... - **Minseok**

You can always threaten them. What if they don't listen to you lock them up? - **Kyungsoo**

We've been over this, Soo, you can't do this. I don't want to have to visit you in prison. - **Jongin**

Can you try and talk to them quietly? - **Chanyeol**

Not sure it's working. - **Jongdae**

We're with you, I'm sure you'll find a solution and in the worst case, we can always send Luhan to them. - **Sehun**

... Yeah, we can do that, too. - **Kyungsoo**

** Why can they never be good examples? I mean, okay, we're not the most mature, wise, calm people in the world. But we're still better than Luhan, right? - **Jongdae**

... Depends on the day. - **Minseok**

My own lover is against me. That's blasphemy. - **Jongdae**

You can at least tell yourself that when you're with Minseok you're immediately more respectable than when you're with Lu... ? - **Junmyeon**

I thought you were nice, Jun? - **Luhan**

Yeah, but he's honest, too. - **Sehun**

Maybe you stop harassing JunJun, and find a solution for him? Or can I handle it? - **Yixing**

... Yeah, no. Just leave it to us. Last time we let you take charge of something, it ended up on fire. - **Kris**

*** But they're just cats? Minseok did bring back squirrels and Kyungsoo brought back penguins. All I want are cats! - **Junmyeon**

It doesn't matter what animal it is, Junmyeon, they're all banned in the Academy. - **Administration**

But there's plenty of them in the yard... - **Jongdae**

Well, Junmyeon can just go see them and play with them there. - **Administration**

... It's not fair. - **Junmyeon**

Don't worry Jun, we'll find a solution! - **Luhan**

... Yeah, now I'm really scared. - **Junmyeon**


	4. Chapter 03.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey!
> 
> I know I’m late!  
> But it’s so complicated at the moment... Adjusting myself to be forced to stay at home.  
> BUT, in the good things, I HAVE more time to translate my French-fiction.
> 
> So there is the third chapter!  
> Hope you enjoy it.
> 
> Stay safe everyone!

**So here we are again for a new list, this time with the codes of conduct of : Byun Baekhyun, Kim Jongdae and Zhang Yixing.**

**Two out of three are among the most disruptive elements of this academy*. While the last one is often in his own head and rarely gets noticed, however, he remains in relation with the other eleven, which, as a result, sometimes leads to a few slip-ups. (Let's not forget that just because they look innocent doesn't mean they are. It’s often those who do look innocent that are the worst).**

* I wish I could get so mad and call lies what's just been written here, but I know (even though it's deep in my brain) that it's the truth - **Baekhyun**

I totally agree with Baek. But I'd still like to point out that if Yi is in the mood, he can be worse than all of us put together. He's a dangerous being within these walls. We have to be careful. - **Jongdae**

Your compliments are so kind and touching! I couldn't be happier! I'll tell Junmyeon right away. And then we'll have to feed the horses and unicorns on campus! - **Yixing**.

Horses, I agree. But do we need to have another conversation with you about unicorns? - Kyungsoo

Leave him alone. If he wants to believe it, who does it hurt? - **Junmyeon**.

You're overprotective, Jun. He needs to face the truth. Or, at least a little. Put false horns on horses is NOT normal. The poor horses! (Which is a pity, because apart from that, he's great with them...) - **Minseok**

It's a conversation for later. Today's too late, he's already gone. - **Junmyeon**.

* * *

** BYUN BAEKHYUN : **

**Is one of the most disruptive elements of this establishment. He's probably doing it on purpose. We know he can be very smart, and one of the best students, if only he wanted to be. He's not mean, but he can be a bad influence. Even more so if he's with Kim Jongdae or Park Chanyeol. (Even if in a different way.)**

• **THERE ARE SOME THINGS YOU CAN'T DO:**

• It’s imperative that you stop dyeing your hair any colour and according to your moods. Besides ruining it, I'm sure it's against the rules.

• Don't push Kyungsoo over the edge just because you're bored and find it hilarious that he often uses violence. We can't always save you or cure you. (And consider the respect of others. Do Kyungsoo is not a toy, and he mainly attacks Chanyeol, who, according to the rumors, is supposed to be in a relationship with you. We think you'd rather have it in one piece than in several pieces. **)

• Stop stealing Kyungsoo's food all the time if it's not meant for you. We love our students alive and (pretty) healthy, thank you.

• Everyone in this academy knows that you sing better than the national average. Maybe it's time you stopped trying to prove it all the time, all over the place. Use the rooms dedicated to that purpose.***

* Why is it that everything we love is always against the rules? — **Baekhyun**

Because what you love is dangerous to you? Or because it's not politically correct?— **The Administration**

We're in a private academy. No one sees us except the other students and the staff (and faculty.) The fact that Baekhyun dyes his hair doesn't prevent anyone from sleeping at night. — **Jongdae**

Just because you say that doesn't mean you can do the same thing, Kim Jongdae. — **Minseok**

Oh shit... — **Jongdae**

I don't mean to say, but you didn't think anything of it when Sehun turned into a rainbow... — **Baekhyun**

It's because I'm so handsome and elegant with everything and anything that they can't say anything. — **Sehun**

I'd go with the fact that they're afraid of your boyfriend, but fine. If you want to think like that... — **Chanyeol**

True. — **Sehun**

** Dépends on the day, I’ll tell you... — **Baekhyun**

Well, thank you, Love of my life. — **Chanyeol**

No problem. — **Baekhyun**

Are you still pissed at him? — **Jongin**

Yes. — **Baekhyun**

Good luck, my friend. He rarely makes a face like that and I don’t know what you did, but I think you really fucked up. — **Luhan**

Yep... — **Chanyeol**

*** But if I do this, how am I going to share my genius? — **Baekhyun**

First you go on an adventure to find the genius, then you ask him to give you a voice like that of a genius. Then you come back and ask again.— **Kyungsoo**

It was cruel. And funny. But cruel, Soo. — **Luhan**

Only the truth hurts. — **Kyungsoo**

Well, at least you got them make up. Well, judging by the Baekhyun crying in the arms of a Chanyeol who's far too happy that his lover is in tears.— **Minseok**

Oh, God, they're gonna be annoyingagain, aren't they? — **Tao**

... I think, yeah. — **Kris**

• **SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO CHOOSE: IS CHANYEOL YOUR BOYFRIEND OR NOT?**

• Park Chanyeol is not a reference. Just because you quote him every time you have a problem or don't know what to say doesn't mean it's a good thing. Stop believing it.*

• Chanyeol's not a tree yet, and you're not a koala, so stop trying to climb him at the first chance you get.**

• We're aware of the relationship between you and Chanyeol. Kissing him on the lips as soon as someone looks at him is absolutely unnecessary.

• You can say the opposite as much as you want, we all know that you are the most jealous person in this relationship. (Yes, we are aware that Chanyeol is too, if we judge by the fire extinguishers that go through the classroom windows a little too frequently for our liking). We're just saying that between the two of you, you're the most jealous. Assume it, it's not taboo.***

* And if it pleases me to believe that Channie's a great reference? — **Baekhyun**

... I'd just say you're in a very bad position to succeed in life, but so be it. Do whatever you want to do. — **Kyungsoo**

It was just mean. — **Chanyeol**

I agree with the pole. He may be a little moon-eyed and silly, but he's not a total idiot either!— **Luhan**

I’m not answering to that. — **Kyungsoo**

** If you had eyes, and you knew how to use them, you'd know it's not as easy as that. — **Baekhyun**

Baek. Just because you think Chan's hot, sexy, and all, doesn't mean it's the same for everyone. Sure, it's reassuring enough that you want to keep climbing all over him, otherwise everyone would question your relationship, but please stop lumping everyone in the same basket. — **Minseok**

But! Minseok! — **Baekhyun**

No, Baekhyun. Be reasonable for once in your life. — **Minseok**

... I think you're asking too much of him, Seokkie!— **Jongdae**

You shut up because you're no better. — **Minseok**

Ouch... — **Luhan**

Do you really want to start, Lu? — **Sehun**

... No, I’m fine. Thank you. — **Luhan**

*** ... I won't say anything. Just that at least I don't throw fire extinguishers out the window when some totally shady guy who's trying to steal what's mine goes to talk to MY Chanyeol. - **Baekhyun**

Indeed. You'd rather just try to throw the guy himself out the window... - **Jongin**

I thank heaven every day for the fact that he does not have enough strength to succeed. - **Junmyeon**

All traitors! - **Baekhyun**

Welcome to the club.- **Luhan**

• **LAST-MINUTE RULES.**

• You need to stop taking your teachers for idiots. They know you're no angel. And they've known that since the first week you came to the Academy. You're just like Luhan: the body and head of an angel, but with the personality of the devil.*

• The Academy choir isn't your personal stage. If the person in charge tells you you're not doing the solo, you don't do the solo.

• As of today, you and Kim Jongdae are banned from the Academy Drama Club forever.**

• One last thing: Shrek was NOT included in the list of plays to be performed this year.

* Why do you always bring me back to comparisons like this? For once I was quietly minding my own business and Sehun's! - **Luhan**

... Yeah, leave him alone! - **Sehun**

I think I have absolutely no desire to know what you two were doing, do I? - **Junmyeon**

Let the lovers be in love, okay? It's the youth of today. - **Yixing**

Why are you talking like I'm NOT their age, Yi? - **Junmyeon**

Oh, I just saw my friend the unicorn. I gotta go. Kisses, bye, love you! - **Yixing**

** WHY? - **Baekhyun**

YEAH! You're doing everything you can to make it work, and sure, the sets are ruined, the curtain is broken, and there may have been, possibly, a very small fire, but it was for the best, and this is how we thank you? I AM OUTRAGED! - Jongdae

... I'm out of words. I have to change friends. And boyfriend. - **Minseok**

Don't look for me, I jumped off a cliff. Goodbye. - **Kyungsoo**

... And we're the dramaqueens? - **Baekhyun, Jongdae, Tao.**

Yes. - **Sehun**.

* * *

**KIM JONGDAE:**

**Is just as disruptive as Byun Baekhyun, however, and unlike Byun Baekhyun, Kim Jongdae is more apt to listen when Kim Minseok is the one telling him what to do. (Whether out of love, instinct or threat, he does it, and honestly? That's all that matters to us...)**

**However, as Minseok has made it very clear, the older one isn't always... willing to help us, and prefers to let things happen naturally. (Even if the consequences are often disastrous.)**

**Kim Jongdae has a face that inspires confidence, but like Baekhyun and Luhan, we shouldn't rely on appearances.**

• **MINSEOK IS NOT A GOD AND IS NOT ALL-POWERFUL.**

• First of all, we would really like to stop making headings like this on almost every code of conduct. Jongdae will be the last one because Minseok decided it would be a good idea to pair up with the younger one. (Why don't you hold on to your future, Minseok?!*)

• As the title of this list says: Kim Minseok is not God. He's not all-powerful Nor does he have any power or authority over what goes on in this Academy.**

• So you have to stop hiding behind him like he's a shield. Face the bullshit. (Besides, our sanctions are often less severe than Minseok's...) (I don't know if we should be proud of our student, or afraid of him. It's still under consideration...)

• Minseok is a good student. He works for it. You should do like him once in a while.

* I care about my future. My heart a little less. And generally, we can't ignore what our heart wants for long, can we? - **Minseok**

... I don't know why I think it's adorable when it's clearly mean. - **Jongdae**

Because you're a little bit of an idiot? - **Baekhyun**

I won't give you the pleasure of answering that. And I'll get Chanyeol to come and get you. - **Jongdae**

I'm already with him. - **Chanyeol**

I love so much the conversations you're having here when you're in the exact same room as everybody else because we stole... took, sorry, the drafts of the new rules and regulations and totally trashed them. (Improving would be the more accurate term, but hey...) - **Luhan**.

Sehun, keep an eye on your boyfriend before I decide it's time for him to leave our Earth. - **Kyungsoo**

Too lazy. - **Sehun**

** Why do you always want to kill our dreams? I thought you were supposed to encourage us? - **Jongdae**

Jongdae, love of my life, I think the dreams they are supposed to encourage have to do with our professional future. Not your disappointments. - **Minseok**

Why do I love you already? - **Jongdae**

I wonder about you every day, and then I look at you and I forget everything... - **Minseok**

Oooooh, little Minnie's in a romantic mood! - **Luhan**

Luhan? Shut up. - **Sehun, Minseok, Kyungsoo, Junmyeon and Kris.**

... - **Luhan**

• **YOUR FRIENDS AREN'T YOUR WHIPPING BOY.**

• Kyungsoo is not Satan and is not part of his family. No matter what makes him think so.*

• I remind everyone, especially Kim Jongdae, that Luhan is NOT a person you want to piss off. Please remember that!

• Yixing is still an innocent person. One of the last ones in this establishment. And he must remain so. Stop trying to corrupt him.**

• You and Baekhyun are officially banned from using social networks from today until further notice.***

* How can you be sure? - **Jongdae**

Stop being mean to Soo. He's adorable and everyone knows it! - **Jongin**

... You're the only one who thinks so, Jongin. - **Luhan**

Wrong. I think so, too. - **Chanyeol**

Should I be worried? - **Baekhyun**

No Chanyeol, you have a derivative of Stockholm Syndrome it’s totally different. - **Luhan**

Why doesn't anyone care about his life here? - **Sehun**

What do you mean? - **Luhan**

I mean, I just seeing Kyungsoo coming at you with his set of kitchen knives. I'm not so sure that's a good thing... - **Sehun**

Damn it! - **Jongdae, Baekhyun, Jongin and Chanyeol**

** THANK YOU! Finally something that makes sense in these damn codes of conduct! - **Junmyeon**

I think you and Junmyeon are somewhat blind... But that's okay. It's not a big deal. - **Luhan**

Shh! I already told you I wanted him to think that for a little while longer! - **Yixing**

You just fucked yourself up there, Yi... - **Tao**

... Oops? - **Yixing**

What? What's going on?- **Junmyeon**

Forget it, Junmyeon is the most innocent person in this establishment! - **Sehun**

*** WHY? Just because of one little sentence out of nothing? - **Jongdae**

... I mean, the sentence discredited the entire Academy; Dae... I think it's still a good reason. - **Minseok**

Depends on your point of view! - **Baekhyun**

No. Absolutely not. - **Kyungsoo**

We think it's abusive. - **Jongdae & Baekhyun**

We forgot to mention above: But you are also forbidden to use social networks on the phones/tablets/computers of your friends, boyfriends and all other students present here. - **The Administration**

Meanie, you're just meanie. - **Baekhyun & Jongdae**

• **LAST-MINUTE RULES.**

• You'd have to stop yelling at alltime. You've got a voice that we know you've got to stop forcing on it all the time. (In addition to disturbing the people around you, it could be dangerous for your vocal cords in the long run).

• We generally don't want to get students hooked on caffeine, but for the safety of this school: drink your coffee before you start talking in the morning.*

• Stop scaring the choir, who did nothing and is innocent. Just join them. (And please make sure Baekhyun doesn't do anything stupid, Minseok.)**

• For the last time, the Academy site is a serious place and not a playground.

* I'm so insulted and humiliated that you think I can't act like a normal, mature person without caffeine in my blood. - **Jongdae**

I think you feel that way because they're right. - **Kris**

You don't talk for I don't know how long and when you decide to make your presence known, it's to say bullshit AND insult me even more? - **Jongdae**

... You had your coffee this morning, 'Dae? - **Minseok**

... Yes? - **Jongdae**

Go take it and come back when you're more human than a monster. We only need one Satan Soo here. - **Luhan**

I so want to throw you out the window, but since you're right for the first time in your life, I'm going to let you live. - **Kyungsoo**

That's so nice of you. - **Luhan**

** I'M NOT THEIR BABYSITTER. - **Minseok**

Oh, is that right? - **Sehun**

Sehun you shut up and go do your homework! Also, why put me in here when we were talking about Jongdae? - **Minseok**

Forget it, they'll talk more quietly, they're doing the ostrich technique. - **Jongdae**

I quit. - **Minseok**

You can't quit when you don't get paid, Minseok What you're doing is volunteering and forced volunteering - **Kyungsoo**

I hate you. - **Minseok**

* * *

**ZHANG YIXING:**

**Is one of the most sensitive, innocent, and starry-eyed people in the academy. (Okay, he's the ONLY person in the stars here...) He's incredibly sweet. However, because there is a "however", he is friends with the other 11. He is therefore a dangerous being, and as with everyone in this group of people, you shouldn't judge a book by its cover.**

**He may be innocent and believe in things that are not totally real, but he nevertheless remains (from time to time) down to earth, and ready to drive everybody around him completely crazy. (He often plays with the fact that everybody thinks he is totally innocent, and therefore, unable to do anything stupid. Don't be fooled).**

**But he is still the least dangerous of the lot!**

• **MYTHOLOGY, FANTASY AND THE SUPERNATURAL MEAN THAT IT DOESN'T EXIST IN THE REAL WORLD.**

• Please take note of the fact that unicorns do not exist. And yes, even if we put a paper/cardboard horn on a horse's head, that doesn't make him a unicorn.*

• The same is true of werewolves. They're just legends. There are only rumors and no proof of their existence. (It would be nice, too, if you could stop thinking that everyone you meet for the first time is a werewolf, or knows unicorns personally).

• No, you can't go and get lost in the forest behind the academy to search for and/or meet supernatural beings. Firstly because it's simply impossible and secondly because we don't want to find you hungry and dehydrated. Once again.**

• Also, you're not part of the Harry Potter world. You are not Harry Potter and there is no prophecy that bears your name.

* Even if you believe in it very hard? - **Yixing**

Especially if you believe very strongly in it... - **Jongdae**

I already told you to stop ruining all his dreams! - **Junmyeon**

And we've already told you to stop smothering him so much. - **Minseok**

But, uh... - **Junmyeon**

No, Jun. The more you coddle him, the less successful he'll be when he gets into the business. It's not good for him, and it's not good for you. - **Minseok**

... Do we have to tell him everything directly? - **Junmyeon**

No. Take it slow. - **Minseok**

okay... - **Junmyeon**

Wow. Minseok’s a wizard! - **Luhan**

REALLY? Why didn't anyone tell me this before? - **Yixing**

... Jun? - **Kyungsoo**

I'm on my way. - **Junmyeon**

** First of all, I didn't get "lost" in the forest. I just wanted to camp there for a while to make our friends the magical beasts understand that I was no danger to them. Secondly, you have to stop believing that I'm going to die every step I take just because I don't want to have the same hobbies as everyone else. - **Yixing**

Yi, you were in the infirmary for two weeks when we found you. - **Tao**

And? - **Yixing**

I mean...You almost died that time... - **Jongin**

And personally, in addition to not wanting to lose you, I absolutely do not want to see Jun’ in this state again. - **Kyungsoo**

Next time he can come with me. - **Yixing**

That's even worse! - **Minseok**

Okay, we'll just all go together! How's Saturday sound? Yes? Awesome!- **Yixing**

Why does it always turn out like this? - **Sehun**

• **PEOPLE AREN'T ANGELS SENT FROM HEAVEN AND FLAWLESS.**

• Not everyone has the same heart, Yixing. Sometimes some people are meaner than others. I know it's hard to believe, but the truth is never easy to hear.*

• Kim Junmyeon is not the voice of wisdom. He's far too weak in front of you to tell you the whole truth and always the truth.

• That said, you can still trust Minseok. Well 99% of the time. Every once in a while. Well, always more than Junmyeon.**

• You have to stop believing everything everyone tells you. This can't end well.

* Why can't I think everyone has a piece of good in their heart? - **Yixing**

You can, just make sure you don't get overwhelmed by this belief, and still be on your guard. - **Minseok**

He's right, you can burn yourself if you're not careful Yi! - **Luhan**

... What if I'm careful? - **Yixing**

Then keep going! The world needs people like you! - **Kyungsoo**

** Okay that's good. I'm cutting my losses. Just leave me alone. - **Minseok**

... Or do you accept the influence you have over us? - **Kris**

Accepting it means the end of the world. - **Minseok**

And I'm the Drama Queen? - **Tao**

Yeah. Totally. - **Minseok**

• **LAST-MINUTE RULES.**

• Experiments in and around the academy are prohibited. Unless you are in a suitable room.

• Therefore, there will be no more fires caused by useless experiments. Including in an appropriate room. The next fire caused by your experiments will be at your expense.*

• Also, we are short of fire extinguishers. If there is a fire, the academy will be destroyed. (We therefore advise you either not to start the fire anymore, or to prepare buckets full of water just in case, because we all know very well that you will not follow our orders**).

• Stop trying to mix DNA, animal or not. It doesn't work, we've all seen it. (Except for accidents that may or may not be dangerous and deadly.) It won't create a unicorn. Besides, it seems to us that it is illegal.

* But I'm poor! - **Yixing**

So stop experimenting like that? - **Kyungsoo**

No. - **Yixing**

It was just a proposition. - **Kyungsoo**

Maybe you calm down for a while, you just do the written hypotheses and think them over, and AFTER you do the experiments? - **Minseok**

it can be smart, actually. - **Sehun**

... It's true that when you put it like that. - **Yixing**

** That could be a solution, yeah... - **Yixing**

Why are you doing this to us? Now he's seriously considering it! - **Baekhyun**

At least he'll be prepared the next time he screws up. That's something to think about, especially when you know he won't listen to them. - **Chanyeol**

And how do you know that, hm? - **Junmyeon**

because from time to time we have to be honest with ourselves and admit that NO ONE, and I mean none of us, are going to listen to them. And I know for a fact that Yixing will do exactly the same thing we will! - **Chanyeol**

For once he's saying something clever, this one. - **Kyungsoo**

I KNEW YOU LOVED ME! - **Chanyeol**

... - **Kyungsoo**

And who's your "sure" source? - **Junmyeon**

Yixing. - **Chanyeol**

Yeah, and for real? - **Junmyeon**

Yixing. - **Chanyeol**

He's right, I told him not even ten minutes ago. - **Yixing**

... Oh. - **Junmyeon**


End file.
